Lux

I’ve told you all about my crazy three-year-old, but I haven’t told you much about Lily. She’s eleven. She was my first baby. Her dad and I had a whirlwind high school romance that led to an ill-fated early marriage.

Lily was my first best friend. She taught me so much. And, she literally saved my life. When her father and I were separating, I was going through a horrible depression. I was so depressed that I couldn’t even recognize myself in the mirror. I think it’s called disassociation, but I stared at a stranger. Her dad had to pick me up off the floor one night, because I was too sad to stand.

I kept going for Lily. I had to be strong to be her mother. Eventually, with enough faking I got through it. I made it through this indescribable cloud of darkness and onto the other side. Lily probably doesn’t know it, but she had to be a lot stronger than most toddlers did. Through her laughs and silliness, I lived. I honestly believe she was my guardian angel before she ever knew it.

Lily is a quiet, but spunky and grumpy kid. She is fierce and wild. I’m honored to be her mother. She has taught me more about life than I’ve ever learned inside of a text book or classroom, and she has shown me how to love.

#ls